Indeed, I definitely learned a life lesson that came with not so great consequences. The permanent loss of my natural voice. Sense of smell and taste severely altered and in most cases, gone. A large scar from ear too ear, a second "grin", the large point of entry when they removed my larynx (voice box) and all lymph nodes (roughly 20-30 on each side of my neck).
Hopefully temporary, but other side effects from surgery...a swollen neck. This condition is called Lymphedema. The radiation side effect I'm also hoping is temporary is the facial hair loss. In some patients it grows back. Sometimes even a different color. Other patients it never comes back.
There's so much that has changed. It's crazy to fathom how even the simplest things in life are affected. From a physical, emotional and psychological perspective.
Reflecting back, I'll never forget that first cigarette. I was 14. Living in New Orleans with my Dad. A friend of mine had a stepfather who was a sailor on a freighter. He was always bringing back stuff from overseas. My buddy and I just had too try one of those Japanese versions of a Marlboro red!
After that, I would swipe a Benson and Hedges from my Dad when he left his pack unattended. This all stopped when I moved back to Florida where my Mother was.
My next encounter with cigarettes was in Jr. High. Smoking was all part of fitting in with the "cool" kids, ya know? I was hooked for life after that fateful morning at the bus stop.
Any smoker reading this, not so "cool" now, am I? What's sad is that most smokers will look the other way when it comes too anti smoking literature or commercials on TV. I know because I was one of those that chose too ignore.
And just think. I STILL didn't want to believe it or accept the truth that I had cancer. I kept putting it off until it damn near cost me my life. One, maybe two more weeks at home unchecked and Patty would have found me gone in my sleep.
It was too late for me, but the diagnosis of throat cancer scared me COLD TURKEY off of cigarettes. After hearing Dr. Ringstrom saying "Oh no" while looking down my throat that March day. Turning me around too show me the image of my consumed larynx. Seeing Patty break down in tears because at that point I thought I was staring at my death sentence. I was literally waiting for Dr. Ringstrom to tell me how little time I had left. Instead, he gave me hope. My last cigarette, although obviously too late, was put out on the way too that appointment. Never touched another one after that.
Yes, a life lesson that's now a part of my life every day, but in a different way for sure. This is my "Bible" away from church. Hopefully my life lesson will help educate others. This book pretty much explains the before, during, and after of how I lived and currently live each day.
Well, I blabbed a long time again! Gotta feed the birds! 😊
